Attachment styles can determine the path of your relationship.
We bring lots of personal baggage to our relationships. This is the stuff we’ve learned from childhood and have stored inside our heads. They are what’s underneath the things we believe and how we interpret situations, the kinds of emotions we experience, and our behaviors. They determine how we interact with our partner, and that has everything to do with the goodness of our marriage, and any other intimate relationship.
Attachment style — how we connect with other people — is one form of baggage. These are developed from past relationships and set the rules for our future ones. If, for example, when we were young and felt upset and someone made us feel better, we might regard others as a source of comfort and security. But if we felt abandoned or neglected in the past, we might feel insecure in our adult relationships.
There are three attachment styles for intimate relationships. Note that we’re not usually completely one style or another; rather, we tend to lean toward one to varying degrees, although one style might dominate our personality.