Here’s some irrational beliefs we might hold even before we find a partner. We can’t get married now because we’re not ready emotionally or we need our careers in a better place. Or we must get married right away because everyone we know is married, we’re running out of time to have children, or we’ll end up alone. When we feel pressure to marry, we might set standards so low that anyone who isn’t already married or dead is a potential candidate. Or if we’re afraid we might make the wrong selection, we may use such strict criteria that not even the gods would make the cut.
These beliefs are irrational because they don’t describe an actual person. You may have very good reasons for not wanting to be with a particular individual, but that should have everything to do with the person and not with your general beliefs. The truth is we’re all completely ready, and never ready, for marriage. And there’s really no way to predict whether a relationship will work out, regardless of all the precautions we take when we are looking for a partner.